The BIG Number ONE

Today is G's First Birthday!!!

I had already anticipated that all day I'd look at the clock and have vivid memories of what was going on a year ago at that time. That around 4:00-5:00pm things would begin to get fuzzy as that's the point I reached the "transition temper tantrum phase". What I hadn't expected is that as I would get those flashes of memories, I'd be encouraging myself. To breath through the contraction, to get through that push...that there's so much more to look forward to than just holding that little baby. You have this amazing little girl to look forward to.

I had not anticipated that my voice would quiver as we'd start to sing the first line of "Happy Birthday"...and I wonder if anyone else noticed.

At night, when I rock G while she drinks her nighttime bottle, is usually when emotions flood me. All the maternal emotions of how amazing this creature is. What a great gift God has given me. Tonight is no different. Yet it was so easy to compare, and become nostalgic. A year ago I was nursing her for the first time, not giving her a bottle of formula/cow milk mix. And when she snuggles on my shoulder for a couple minutes before being laid down, that a year ago she fit perfectly on my chest in a little bundle....her arms & legs didn't drape around my whole body. As my silent tears begin to flow, letting myself mourn the loss of her "babyhood"...I feel a little hand pat my shoulder. And I know I've got an amazing little girl to look forward to. And really, those 11, 2 & 5am feedings...weren't all that fun.

Then G pushes away from my chest, and waves good-bye. Telling me it's time to turn out the light, turn on her cd player and lay her down for the night.

At exactly 8:20 pm my little girl is a year old! I think I may have to sneak back into her room, and give her one more goodnight kiss to officially celebrate her birth.

Drug Free's the Way to Be!

***Disclaimer. You are about to read an article about one of two subjects in the world that I am incredibly passionate about. I am not ideal pushing....I'm just sharing my thoughts.***

I should not read things that will frustrate me. I should not read things that will frustrate me. I should not read things that will frustrate me.

With that said....WHY DO I READ THINGS THAT WILL FRUSTRATE ME?

Okay I feel a little better.
I ventured onto a  message board about an entirely different subject and found a post about natural childbirth.
First let me say - while I believe that natural childbirth is amazing and that women have been lead to believe that it is a painful, scary process - I understand that it can't always be done. Some people think it's crazy to even consider. The glory of America is we get to choose what is best for us & our babies.

But oh how I can't stand when women, who don't like natural childbirth, try to back up their argument with statements like "I don't see how it can be good for the baby if the mother is all stressed out from pain."

Let's get one thing straight - labor IS natural. You're not supposed to be all vegged out & comfy, sitting in bed, waiting for the nurse to tell you it's okay to push.

I scoffed when I read an article about Giselle Budchen stating that she wasn't in pain when she labored. (The scoff was partially due to the fact she's married to Tom Brady, and I am, after all, a Giants fan.) I was early in my pregnancy at the time, and hadn't really begun to research natural childbirth. However, reading that article started the gears in my head & I started to research. Boy am I glad I did.

When I was in labor with G it was no picnic, but I can honestly say that I never considered myself to be in pain. I consider "in pain" to be a gun shot wound, a bone protruding from your flesh, something along those lines...not labor.

I now regard my daughter's birth as the single most amazing experience of my life. (As all women should regard the birth of their children.) Yet when I think of her birth...I begin to daydream about the day I actually get to experience labor & birth again.

Yes, you read that right.